You Have To Meet the Family First
No, you don’t.
Many girls will tell you that you have to meet the family before she can go out with you. It’s their culture. They will want you to come to their home, do the meet and greet, and then go out on the date.
Don’t do it.
You will end up wasting all of your time if you give in to the pressure.
Kindly explain to the girl that you want to meet her first, to see if you like one another. Assure her that if everything goes ok on the first date, then you will make plans to meet her family the next day.
It only makes sense. If you have two weeks vacation in the Philippines, you’ve got to use the time wisely. Meet a girl for dinner and if you’re not feeling it, drop her and move on to the next prospect!
Don’t waste time meeting family until you’re sure it’s worth the investment.
Let Her Bring A Cousin On The First Date
The next thing she is going to ask is if it’s ok to bring her cousin, sister, or auntie on the date. Let her bring one of her female cousins.
Make sure she is clear on the fact that you want her to bring one cousin.
Reiterate and verify she’s bringing a female cousin by asking the girl’s name. Be friendly yet sneaky and ask to chat with her cousin for a minute so you can introduce yourself and say hello.
I say these things out of experience. If you merely tell her it’s ok to bring someone, she will bring three male cousins, two aunties, grandma, and four kids. You will end up forking out a hundred bucks and never even get to talk to the girl.
It’s happened to me on so many occasions that I had to adopt some extreme measures to prevent from going broke. If a girl shows up with unauthorized guests, I leave. Right then and there.
Don’t Forget Who You Are
It’s very easy to get caught up into thinking that you have to accommodate 100% of the girl’s culture. I did that in the beginning. I finally realized that it wasn’t fair to me. Now, I tell every girl this:
“Hey, our cultures are very different. Everything has to be 50/50.
I’m American. I’m not Filipino.
If you want someone to conform to all of your customs, then you need to find a local guy down on the basketball courts.”
I’m quite ok with explaining to her and her family that I’m not from the Philippines and therefore, do not expect me to be Filipino.
Once you break it down to them and are firm on it, they’ll start to understand and respect your position. Most guys are weak and conform.
Your girl’s best friend, who is dating a foreigner, has probably tainted her with stories about what the 87-year-old guy did when they first met. Screw that.
Filipinas Are Never On Time
If you tell a Filipina in Manila to meet you for dinner at 7:00 pm, she will not show up until around 9:30 pm.
Here’s what will happen:
You agree to meet at a set time, via texting back and forth. She says that she is on her way to the bus station, so you go to the restaurant to wait.
At 7:30 pm, when she doesn’t show, you start texting her. You get no reply.
You keep texting and calling until around 8:30 pm, get pissed off and decide to leave. As soon as you take a shower and get settled in your bed at the hotel, you receive a text from the girl, asking where you are.
Let me explain what actually went down…
Forward thinking is not a strong point of Filipino girls.
They don’t think ahead at all. So if you tell them to meet at 7:00 pm, they will head to the bus station at around 6:30.
They don’t stop to think about the fact that traffic in Manila is absolutely terrible. It’s the worst in the world. That damn bus ride will end up taking three hours just to get from one side of Manila to the other.
Junk Cell Phones = Poor Communication
The other issue is their lack of communications capability.
I’m talking about their cell phones.
All of the Filipinas I’ve ever dated have two things in common:
- The battery is always dead on their cell phone (didn’t think to charge it)
- They never have any load (minutes) so they can’t text you back (no pesos)
So, when your girl gets on the bus to come meet you, she has no load to text you. Thirty minutes later the battery will go dead.
When she gets to the mall she will have to borrow someone’s phone to send you a text.
That’s when you’re already back at your hotel, madder than a smashed cat.
Note: Unless you tell her ahead of time to physically write your number down on a piece of paper, she won’t even be able to retrieve your number without borrowing a charger as well!
Most girls here are not rocking iPhones. They’re still sporting the old Nokia handset that only does talk and text.
Many of them will have a phone with a cracked screen and keys that don’t work.
I was trying to set up a date with a girl one time and she would never respond to the question I asked via text message. She would respond with something totally off topic.
We finally ended up meeting in person and she admitted that the screen on her phone was cracked. She could only see a few characters of the message. The poor girl had to take a guess about what I was asking. She was too shy to tell me that her phone was broken.
The Shyness Factor – Be Accommodating
When the girl and her cousin do finally show up at the agreed upon location, they may be too shy to walk into the restaurant. You will have to get up from your table and meet them outside.
Talk About Family
What do you talk about? The easiest topic is family.
Focus on discussing her family and she will be happy. It will also allow you to figure out exactly what you’re dealing with. Maybe you’ve already covered it during months of Skyping, but use the topic of her family as the ice breaker.
Take Good Care of the Girl and Be Fair
When it’s time for them to leave and head back home, make sure you give them money for transportation. Pay the transportation to get there and back, because chances are they borrowed the money to be able to meet you. It’s only fair, no matter how great or terrible the date went. Don’t be an asshole.
If you really like the girl and want to see her again the next day, go to 7-11 and buy some load for her phone. Or, you can just share some of the load from your cell phone.
Remember that if you don’t supply her with cell phone load, you’re not getting any texts back from her. It’s not because she doesn’t want to text you, it’s because she doesn’t have the means. Don’t be cheap.
Invest a Little in the Relationship
I’ve said in other blog articles that you should never send money to someone who you only know online. That’s stupid.
However, when you finally make it all the way to the Philippines and meet a girl in person, the gloves should come off. That’s when you have to start taking chances to see where it goes. At that point, your spending actually becomes an investment in your future.
I’m not saying to try to buy her love by showering her with gifts.
I am saying that if you only have a week with the girl, make it count. Buy some groceries and let her mom cook a nice meal for you and the family. Take the family out to a movie.
If you decide that she is the one, get the girl a proper cell phone so you can communicate with her. If you don’t, she’ll still be humping it over to the comm shop at all hours of the night in the rain. That’s not fair to her.
Make sure you read my other articles on How to Date a Filipina so you’re well prepared.
One Last Tip
To mitigate everything I’ve discussed in this post and avoid getting pissed off, here’s the best thing to do:
For your first date, pick a restaurant right next to your hotel. Tell the girl to meet you there at 5:00 pm.
Don’t leave the comfort of your hotel room until 7:00 pm.
If she does show up on time (highly unlikely) and texts you, you can quickly walk next door and begin the date.
Great advice! This is the sort of information I’ve been looking for to prepare myself for the time I plan on spending in the Philippines.
You left out so much truth. They all have a boyfriend and will act shy and innocent . A man in his 50-60 must ask himself why a 20 year old would find him appealing to her, If you had little money to spend and send her would she stick around? Of course not . First had experience My husband met the girls family took them all out for dinner , bought her a cell phone because she said her cell phone got hacked and wasn’t working,, clothes, they love to have you take them shopping. They always have a sad story about how they have a hard time and don’t have money. Everyone in the world can tell has a sad story even here in America. What is so different and special about theirs? Well i’ll tell you they act like parranas and have learned to manipulate and lie very well. She then ended up saying she was pregnant and told him it was his. He asked for a DNA test. She told him that is insulting of course its yours. She said she’s very religious and Catholic. She has a kid already out of wedlock already form another guy. I would ask if you are so religious why are you sleeping with a man old enough to be your father that you just met. Is that Catholic religion ? Of course not she used religion as a scam to make him think she was innocent and holy. After send her money for her and her fake pregnancy for months I find her on Tripadviser giving reviews on a hotel in Honkong and my older daughter shows him that another recent trip she was on in Malaysia and check in as a couple with another man. Her social media showed pictures of her with another man old man that she has been with for years and a younger man her child’s father. My husband thought he could fool me being in another country starting a secret life but it really turned out to be hell for him. She sent him an old photo of her pregnant from her first pregnancy and he still believed she was pregnant. My daughter showed him that she checked into a place were they will not let you in if you are pregnant because its dangerous and the liability is to great for them. He was shown this information
and said no that must be old because she lost that watch he he bought her a new one. My daughter said its time stamped on social media . For some reason he keep making excuses for everything even all the pictures of her with other men the same time he was seeing her. So my advice to traveling men that was given from one of my younger daughter high school class mates who is a Philippine boy and who;s family is from the Philippines he your dad is traveling to the Philippines? The girls their target 50-60 year olds . My young daughter told me this and I joked and told my husband about what her high school friend had told her when he first started traveling there. Its crazy to think even a young boy has more street smart than older men. It;s that older men can’t resist being hit on by a young girl but it will have huge consequences for your family.
i’m a much younger than my husband and people think he’s my father so I didn’t know why he did this. I take such good care of our family, I cook, clean, do everything for the household and I have a career , I bring in money for my family. He had the sweet nice girl with him the whole 18 years. I didn’t cheat and lie and have him take care of my struggling family to keep the pressure of of him. The only difference is i’m not 20 years old and I don’t tell sad stories and lie. I’m not Catholic but I have strong family values. Just because someone says their Catholic doesn’t mean they are good people. My husband is Catholic and I found out he has been cheating on me since the day we met . He was in his 40’s and I was in my twenties. He hurt his young kids deeply for his strong Catholic values and she is teaching her 3 year old daughter to use men because she brings her daughter to meet many different men so they feel sorry that she is a single mother and has money problems. May 1st and we don’t have rent or money for money for our own kids health insurance which will probably be cancelled. But he made sure that her and some other mans kid was taken care of.
My husband is a Philippine man and has no Catholic values that I thought. She sent him a message that she lost her cell phone while grocery shopping the other day. They keep coming up with lie after lie. Who put their phone down while grocery shopping especial a Phillipine girl. I heard it’s practically glued to their ear. The money he sends her through Western Union is spent on her and her Philippino pimp to travel with on vacations that they then post on social media. I don’t get it just because a girl said she is pregnant you believe her. He was going to move over their with her until he found out she goes with many men from all the pictures on social media. He was planning on getting a place with her while he travels their and bye her a car to drive him. Imagine how many men would have been over his house while he traveled back to the states to visit his loyal , decent family. He lost all respect from his kids and his business partners think how could you have done this to your beautiful young wife and young kids for her? Good luck you have been warned just like my husband was . I will believe a young Philippine boy over an older man any day!
Bad advise given. A young Philippine boy her in the states told my young daughter if your dads traveling to the Philippines they will target him because they go after men in there 50-60. I joked and told my husband his advise. Come to find out My Catholic Philippine husband found a young Very religious Catholic single mother he sleep with and she said she was pregnant and for months she needed a new phone, a new watch, see she loses everything and need a new one. And all the Western Union transfers for her and her daughter was all spent on her and her boyfriends trip to HongKong, Malaysia , Singapore . They love to travel and lie. Her and her family have strong Catholic Values just like my husband who is Philippine. I’m neither of these just a young loyal mom myself who has a career to bring money in and take good care of my family. I will take the advice of young Philippine boy over an olde man any day. He was right, Smart kid ! Oh ya they will send you old pregnancy photos to show you that they are pregnant and won’t take a DNA test because they say thats insulting you are the father. Good Luck!
Good Luck!
Thanks for your comment and input on the topic. It’s always good to hear from my female readers and listen to a different perspective.
I’m a Pinay and date foreigner guys and the “junk cellphone” doesn’t apply to me. Lol!
Beautiful Sheina,
Damn girl, you look good!
Yeah, the reason you don’t have a junk cell phone is because some foreign guy bought you a nice Samsung. Simple. But, that’s good for me. Now you can chat King Marcos anytime you want. Let me know where you live so I can come drink Red Horse with your kuya.
Marcos
Poor advise. Everything you state is false or should I say does not apply to everyone. And all you haters believe what you want to believe.